Half a Life Without You
by RenJo78
Summary: He never had a chance to find happiness, sacrificing his life for the "greater good". His existence full of only loss and suffering – it was just so painfully unfair and sad. I fervently whisper my deepest wishes over and over again "I wish I could give him happiness, I wish I could show him love".
1. My Heart Is Broken

**Half a Life Without You**

 **Chapter 1: "My Heart is Broken"**

 **I do not own the Harry Potter universe or its characters. I wish I could claim it as my own, but I am having fun putting a different spin on the story. I hope you enjoy!**

 **(My heart is broken – Song by Evanescence - Synthesis)**

" _I pull away to face the pain_

 _I close my eyes and drift away_

 _Over the fear that I will never find_

 _A way to heal my soul_

 _And I will wander 'til the end of time_

 _Torn away from you"_

" _My heart is broken_

 _Sweet sleep, my dark angel_

 _Deliver us from sorrow's hold_

 _Or from my hard heart"_

" _I can't go on living this way_

 _But I can't go back the way I came_

 _Shamed of this fear that I will never find_

 _A way to heal my soul_

 _And I will wonder 'til the end of time_

 _Half a life without you"_

My body trembles as tears begin coursing down my face. I frantically swipe them away, but they stubbornly continue raining down my face falling onto the pages of my book. I glance down and watch as the tiny drops blur the words. I reach out to wipe them away and notice a single word smeared under my thumb… _ **Always**_.

An intense wave of grief washes over me, I can't-can't stop it, why can't I stop? Captured by the intensity of my emotions I close my eyes and wish for a way to release myself from sorrow's hold, but there's no mercy, no release from the anguish only sorrow brings. My heart is broken.

In this moment I feel wrecked, I can't help worrying I may be broken inside. How can I allow myself to be so destroyed by a man I don't know – a man that isn't even real? I scream internally "IT'S NOT REAL!", desperate to stop the irrational despair now consuming me.

Slamming the book closed I toss it to the floor, panicked by my inability to prevent the sobs washing over my body. I look around in alarm for an escape, my breathing is becoming erratic and burns painfully against my chest, I can't help wondering if I can die from the grief ripping through my soul.

My brain is screaming at me to gain control. I surge up from my seat on the couch, pushing my hands forcefully to the sides of my head I pull my hair slightly from my scalp. I can't contain my agony any longer, and a tormented cry escapes my lips "WHY!?" the single word bounces uselessly throughout the room. I crash to my knees; my hands fall limply to the floor weakened by the raw power of emotions just released.

I try to force a numbness to run over me, no longer wanting to feel anything. I invite the emptiness to invade my shattered heart, but it continues to silently cry, refusing my attempts to ignore the void I've just torn through it.

I slowly reach out pulling the book into my lap, tracing my fingers over the words etched into the title of the book cover "Harry Potter and the Deathly Hollows". I draw it closer into my chest wrapping my arms tightly around it. It helps to anchor me through the uncertain storm of my misery, preventing me from drifting into it once again.

I'm not sure how much time has passed, a minute, an hour, I'm unaware of the world around me. I turn to stare vacantly at the flames crackling softly within my fireplace. Leaning back against the couch I question my extreme reaction over the death of a fictional man. He felt real, everything just felt so real, especially in those final moments. He never had a chance to find happiness having sacrificed his life for the "greater good", knowing only loss and suffering for most of his life – it was just so painfully unfair and sad to know he only had half a life. Feeling the familiar sting prickling behind my eyes, I lay down on the floor curling into a protective ball.

I close my eyes as silent tears trickle over my cheeks and began to fervently whisper my deepest wishes over and over again, "I wish I could give him happiness; I wish I could show him love". Soon my eyes grow very heavy and everything darkens, sleep has come to claim my exhausted mind and body taking me into the sweet oblivion of nothingness.

I awake with a groan, my body protesting as I roll over and stretch my sore muscles. Why does everything ache, the pounding in my head causes me to utter another soft groan of protest. I slowly reach up to rub my tired eyes open, squinting as the sunlight from the window temporarily blinds me. I begin to take in my surroundings, the first thing that becomes apparently clear is I'm no longer laying on the floor of my living room. I'm in a large open room with a high arched ceiling. There are rows of beds neatly lined up along the walls draped in white sheets. My mind whirls with shock and confusion "Oh my God, this is a hospital, am I sick? Dying?" a slight panic begins to rise within me, and I clasp my blankets tightly to my chest attempting to shield myself from my new reality.

A loud banging at the other end of the room grabs my attention, I watch as the large double doors swing open. Then I know I'm either still asleep or I've gone crazy because there could be no other explanation for the man slowly walking towards me. His long purple robes sweep the ground as he comes closer, eyes shining brightly from behind his moon shaped glasses. His long beard tucked neatly into his belt but strangely was not as gray as I would have imagined. His voice is whisper soft as he approaches, "Ah my dear, you are neither sleeping nor crazy. I fear you've somehow found yourself in a most peculiar situation. Allow me to properly introduce myself, although I think perhaps you already know who I am", he adds with a small smile before continuing with his introduction, "Albus Dumbledore at your service, and may I ask for your name?" Still in shock I stutter out my name, "E E Everly Q Q uinn, sir."

"Miss Everly Quinn I'm honored to make your acquaintance." His eyes twinkling even brighter if possible.

"Everly do you know how you came to be here?" Unable to find my voice, I shake my head no. He simply nods and I get the feeling he wasn't asking for his knowledge, but to ascertain what I knew. I focus as he continues "I was quite surprised by your sudden appearance, it was rather… unexpected, especially considering the protection wards surrounding Hogwarts. They are exceptionally powerful, and one cannot simply appear within these walls without…injury."

I stare up at him with a look of bewilderment, he's _**surprised**_ by my appearance, I'm fucking stunned. Based on what he just said I'm literally laying in a bed at Hogwarts talking to Albus _freaking_ Dumbledore. Despite his earlier assurance I'm pretty sure I've lost my mind.

Staring into his eyes I can see he now looks amused and I'm now beginning to suspect he knows what I'm thinking." Are you Legilimensing me?" I ask with wide eyes.

A full Cheshire grin spreads across his face, "Sorry, I must admit to being guilty of snooping within your mind a little, I'm skilled in the art of legilimency and find it useful to identify potential threats."

I can't help but feel insulted "I'm not a threat and I really don't want you…uh…snooping through my mind."

He continues to speak to me with his wide smile, as if he didn't just say he's been reading my mind. "Yes, well I had to be sure you weren't here to cause harm, and I can see now this is something altogether different."

I watch as he pulls over a chair to sit beside my bed. I can feel my heart hammering as I build up the courage to ask him the same question, he posed to me a few minutes ago, "how did I get here?"

He peers back at me, his face now serious. "have you heard of soulmates?" I nod my head in the affirmative and silently wonder what direction he could possibly be headed with this.

Leaning forward in his chair he continues, "Soulmates can be used to describe a strong love between two people, but it's much more than just shared love. It's a connection of two souls joining perfectly in mind, body, and soul. It's extremely rare for someone to actually find their true other half, but if the connection is exceptionally powerful it can create a magical force so strong it will bring the two souls together and **nothing** can stop them from finding each other."

Placing his hand on my shoulder he looks at me with gentle concern. Disbelief and apprehension races through me, "are you telling me my soulmate brought me here?"

Slowly pulling his hand away from my shoulder he sighs. "I wish the answer was that simple. There's never been a documented record of a soulmate bond strong enough to pull someone through another dimension, _unless_ they were both born within the same dimension."

I do not miss the slight stress over the word unless, and can't stop my next question, "are you saying you think I was born in this dimension?" I cringe a little as I say the word dimension like it's a natural every day topic, and pinch myself to make sure I'm really awake.

He stares at me with amusement watching me pinch my arm, which thankfully he doesn't comment on before lightly shrugging his shoulders, "I cannot say for certain…at this time anyway…Perhaps, you can tell me a little about your parents?"

Now it's my turn to shrug, "not much to tell, I never knew them." I quickly move onto another question, anything to move the discussion away from my parents, "you said there hasn't been a documented case, what about undocumented?"

He smiles sadly, "It was a very long time ago and from a less than reliable source." He pauses for just a moment as a far-away look enters his eyes, "I promise to revisit my memories and see what truth I can find within them."

I try to remain calm about everything happening, but I just have to know one more thing, "will I know who he is, my… soulmate? Will he know me?" I immediately begin thinking of the man I mourned over last night and I can feel tears building behind my eyes as I wait for his response.

Speaking softly, he answers. "Most people don't immediately recognize or acknowledge the connection they're feeling. Soulmates have a very human component requiring time for feelings to develop. It's not something you can force, however, once two souls come together the bond is unbreakable, it will remain forever filled with the purest love. The strongest magic we have within us all."

Watching me curiously he asks me a question I'm not sure I'm ready to answer. "Everly, do you think you know who your soulmate may be?"

I quickly look down hiding my eyes not wanting to take the risk of him using legilimency on me again. I decide to keep a certain name to myself for now. I shake my head no. He doesn't immediately say anything, and I know he can tell I'm lying. After a short time, he eventually replies, "we'll figure it all out… in time", which sounds more ominous than comforting to me.

I'm starting to feel incredibly tired and my aching body is beginning to shake with the effort to remain up right. Seeing my exhaustion, he calls out for Madam Pomfrey, I watch a woman approach from the other end of the room, she's wearing a nurse's uniform right out of the middle ages complete with ankle length dress, white apron, and a nun like head covering.

She immediately begins speaking to Dumbledore in a scolding tone "Albus! can't you see this poor girl is exhausted and in no condition for lengthy visits? She's been in a coma for almost 5 days, you can't just expect her to be interrogated as soon as she awakens."

My exhaustion and pain forgotten I interrupt her. "Wait! Excuse me I've been in a coma for 5 DAYS!" My voice is starting to quiver with emotion, and I whisper, "what is happening to me?"

She pats my back and gently pushes me against the pillow. "Hush now child, you shouldn't be getting yourself worked up. Everything will be fine. For now, I'm giving you a calming drought and something to help you rest." She pulls out two bottles and hands them over for me to drink. I uncork the bottles and hesitantly sniff the contents. The pungent odors emanating from the small bottles cause me to wrinkle my nose in disgust. I look up at the stern expectant look on Madam Pomfrey's face and decide to gather my courage and quickly down the liquids, but can't help the slight shiver of revulsion as the contents slide down my throat.

Dumbledore looking more than a little entertained by my display stands and places the chair against the wall. Turning back towards me his expression turns sympathetic, "I promise we'll talk more, and I'll attempt to answer all your questions." Saying good-bye to Madam Pomfrey he inclines his head towards me and turns with a swish of his purple robes quietly exiting the room.

My mind is spinning, so many thoughts, so many questions. My eyes grow insanely heavy and I know the potions are starting to take effect. It doesn't stop the silent tears from gliding down my face as I think of him…Severus Snape…my soulmate…at least who I believe and hope him to be.


	2. Retribution

**Half a Life Without You**

 **Chapter 2: Retribution**

 **Severus - POV:**

My breath comes in short pants as I race down the corridor, fucking Potter and his gang of Neanderthals. I stupidly let my guard down after weeks passed with no taunting or pranks, only to find myself ambushed coming down from the astronomy tower. I can still feel the pain radiating through my arm after one of Black's stinging hexes struck me from behind. Bruised and winded, I clinch my fists in frustrated anger, what a bunch of bloody hypocrites, accusing me of meddling with the dark arts while simultaneously throwing brutally painful hexes toward me. Always four against one, their Gryffindor courage a joke – their bravery obviously doesn't extend to a fair fight.

Sprinting around the corner of the passage way, I take the opportunity to duck quickly behind a column hoping to evade my pursuers. I tug one of the nearby tapestries closer to help with my concealment. I stand motionless while my heart thuds loudly against my chest. My furious breathing starting to cause stabbing pain to spread across my sides. I begin to shake and slightly wobble with the enormous effort it's taking to remain unmoving. At this point I know my chances of escape are rapidly dwindling. Silently, I vow to myself one absolute truth, if they discovery me and insist on continuing their assault I will not under any circumstances go down without taking those bastards with me.

I brace myself for the worst as I hear their pounding feet come around the corner, "Oh Snivellus! Come out, come out, where ever you are!" Potter sings as he approaches. I try to quiet my rapid breathing, still clinging to a sliver of hope they'll continue walking past. My hopes are abandoned when I hear Potter's voice.

"Pads, I do believe that tapestry has a pair of shoes sticking out from under it." Black chuckles menacingly "Prongs, I do believe you are correct. A rather unattractive pair if I might add."

Blinding rage takes over, rising like a wild fire burning to my core. With fierce determination, I quickly jump out from behind my temporary hiding spot and start rapidly shoot spells and hexes toward the four boys bearing down on me. I barely say one before I can feel another leave my mouth "STUPIFY! EXPELLIARMUS!"

I smirk as Potter spins comically through the air before hitting a nearby wall and enjoy the baffled look on Black's stupid face as his wand is flung from his hand. Suddenly, I'm hit with a Leg-Locker curse causing me to hit the ground face first snapping my nose. "FUCK!" I let out a cry of pain as blood gushes over my face onto my robes. Where the hell did that come from, I glance over and see a guilt-stricken expression on Lupin's face. He cringes at the amount of blood covering my face as it drips heavily to the floor.

"Guys this has gone far enough, just look at his face!" I can hear Lupin yelling to Potter and Black as they surround me. They just laugh, Black swaggers towards my prone body "Don't worry about your nose Snivellus I don't think anyone will be able to tell the difference." "Yeah, it might even be an improvement." Potter adds.

I look them over with disdain, I can see Lupin hovering worriedly next to Potter and Black while Pettigrew scurries behind them. Black points his wand back at me, "what do you think Prongs?" Potter snickers "I think a good Bat Bogey hex should finish him for now."

Before Black's hex can find its mark, I scream out "PROTEGO!" successfully blocking it. With blood dripping from my fingertips I point my wand at the wall next to them and ferociously cry out "CONFRINGO!" blasting it away. Chunks of the wall suddenly come flying out, the blast throws them up into the air like rag dolls then back down again with excruciating force. They crash dramatically into one another and I swear I can hear their bones snapping. Pieces of the wall violently slam into their sprawled bodies for a few more minutes, until everything quiets, and only small drops of rubble can be heard delicately raining over them.

I can hear their groans of pain echoing through the corridor. I roll over to my back grunting in discomfort, despite my injuries I find myself smiling up at the ceiling - I finally got them! My earlier vow to take those bastards down with me fulfilled. My moment of glory is short lived as my eyesight begins to darken around the corners and everything fades away.

I don't hear the frantic cries coming from down the hall as figures race over to us, I only know my own serenity and welcome the darkness.


	3. Aftermath

**Half a Life Without You**

 **Chapter 3: Aftermath**

 **Everly's POV:**

An agonized cry pierces the still night air, abruptly invading my peaceful slumber. Disoriented I scan the darkened room, my drowsy gaze finds nothing of out of the ordinary. I give a slight shrug thinking it must have just been a bad dream. Laying back against the pillow I snuggle into the blankets letting out a small sigh of contentment and close my heavy eyes.

Only a moment later my eyes widen with alarm, another terrifying scream of pain splits through the darkness. Throwing off my blanket I bolt up from the bed, my tiredness forgotten. Standing immobile against its side I listen and wait helplessly as the awful sounds of distress grow closer. Icy chills of dread race down my spine, the source of those cries having reached just outside the doors. My body stiffens in frightened anticipation not knowing what terrible thing I'm about to be confronted with.

Suddenly, the doors are thrown open banging hard enough to rattle the wall sconces on either side. A voice yells out from the darkened hallway "LUMINOS!", warm bright light fills the room as candles flare to life along the sides and across the heavy chandeliers hanging over head.

Soaring through the entrance are four horizontal robed figures, their floating forms being carried by unseen hands. I let out a startled gasp, and not _**just**_ because they're hovering through the air, each of them appears to be covered in blood. Robes ripped open displaying several nasty gashes along their arms and legs, faces swollen and bruised.

The first to be _carried_ through the door is a dark-haired boy bleeding profusely from a severe leg injury, I can clearly see where the bone cut through the skin bending it unnaturally, I shudder involuntarily only imagining how excruciatingly painful it must be for him.

Rushing footfalls follow closely behind the floating forms. A tall woman with black hair pulled tightly into a bun enters swiftly, her expression grim as she flicks her wand towards one of the beds lined along the wall, slowly placing the boy with the badly broken leg onto it. Despite her efforts to be gentle, he lets out another agonized scream when his leg touches the bed. Without warning, Madam Pomfrey is rushing past me, moving so quickly I feel a breeze push my hair forward as she passes. She immediately begins running her wand over the screaming boy, his body spasming with pain.

My eyes flicker back to the entry way, a slightly over-weight middle aged man with thinning brown hair enters next. He aims his wand and lowers three more boys with various degrees of injury, placing them in the beds directly across from where Madam Pomfrey is currently caring for the boy with the severely damaged leg.

Almost as soon as they're settled onto the beds, sounds of throwing up can be heard. The older gentleman gags turning away to face the corner, apparently a sympathetic vomiter he's of little help to the poor boy. The tall black-haired women dashes over, pushing him out of the way. If the situation wasn't so serious it would have been quite amusing, especially at the woman's scornful remarks, "For Merlin's sake Horace! Get ahold of yourself, we do NOT have time for your nonsense. Humph…Make yourself useful and go and check on Mr. Potter and Mr. Lupin, I'll manage Mr. Pettigrew myself."

Not wasting a moment to remove himself from the situation, I watch as he literally bounces past the woman and vomiting boy, carefully keeping his eyes averted the entire time. Now at a safer distance, he promptly dabs his head with a white handkerchief before beginning to run his wand over the boys' unconscious forms.

I remain frozen in place, the wild chaos around me dulled by blood roaring loudly in my ears. In my head I repeat the names I just overheard, _Potter, Lupin, Pettigrew, Horace._ Staggered I suddenly realize not only did I travel to an imaginary world, I travelled into the past. It was the only way to explain how young they all appeared, even Dumbledore's beard wasn't as gray as it ought to have been. Pain unexpectedly stabs through my hands, realizing they're clenched tightly by my side I shake them open and stare dazedly at the little half-moons bleeding across my palms. A small sigh of anxiety slips from my mouth.

I'm pulled from my inner turmoil when another levitating boy glides through the entrance. Dumbledore walks briskly beside him moving purposely past the others toward the back of the room, exactly to where I'm still standing like a ridiculous statue. The boy's long black hair hangs limply down his back, it's matted against his head with the same dried blood caked over most of his face.

Dumbledore drops the boy delicately on the bed directly next to mine. He then points his wand at the unconscious boy's bloody face, "Episkey". I hear a sickening crack as the boy's nose is snapped back into place. Looking on in silence I thank God he wasn't awake for that. Dumbledore continues running his wand over the boy whispering in low soothing tones what I can only guess are more healing spells.

"I need help over here!" Madam Pomfrey calls out, I look around and can see everyone is busy trying to help the other boys. No longer a frozen statue I find myself running in her direction shouting "I can help, just tell me what you need me to do!"

She hesitates for only a moment before giving me directions, "Grab his arms and place your body over his chest, I need him held as steady as possible! His leg is badly broken, and all my focus and energy must be on the healing spell needed to repair the damage."

I hastily move to his side, taking hold of his arms I place my weight across his chest. I can feel his body trembling beneath mine, sweat trickles over his face mixing with blood from the multiple cuts spattered across his brow and cheeks. It also hasn't escaped my notice how much larger he is than me, and I'm filled with uncertainty at the task before me.

Madam Pomfrey takes position at the end of the bed, her gaze intense as she asks, "are you ready?" I want to scream no, but instead I bravely nod my head yes. I tighten my hold on him and lean over to whisper softly in his ear, "If you can hear me, please try not to move."

Madam Pomfrey catches my eye momentarily before lifting her wand to cast the healing spell over his leg. It snaps loudly back into place causing him to scream out the most unearthly sound of agony, tears of sympathy blur my vision. I reach up to lightly smooth his hair back from his sweaty brow, "Shhh…It's over now. You're going to be just fine." I tell him quietly, hoping I'm being of some comfort.

Looking back at his face I notice his eyes previously squeezed shut with pain are now open, steal gray eyes peer up at me curiously. Realizing I'm still laying over his chest I flush and start to pull away, but before I can shift completely away from his side he grabs my hand and weakly says "stay with me."

Before I can reply Madam Pomfrey is thrusting potion bottles into my hands, "give these potions to him, it's of the up most importance he drinks every drop. I really must go and check on the others." Turning on her heel she briskly walks away.

I glance back down into his ashen face, "I'll stay, but you must promise to drink every drop…it is of the upmost importance after all." I say with a small teasing smile. I'm pleased when his lips turn up slightly in humor. I bring the potion up to his cracked lips and gently place my hand on the back of his head helping him to sit up slightly. He drinks down both potions never removing his inquisitive grey eyes from mine. Flustered by his constant staring I fumble a little putting the empty bottles on the small bedside table and attempt to shift away from his side.

He tightens his grip on my hand, "You said you would stay with me." He softly accuses. I place my hand over his and squeeze gently, "I'll stay." I say reassuringly. "By the way…thank you for…um…holding still", I add awkwardly with a small smile.

He smiles tiredly up at me, "What's your name, love?" he asks drowsily.

I pause and then murmur "Everly."

"Sirius", he says tapping his chest. I can see him fighting to keep his eyes open and focused on me, but the sleep tonic and the events of the night have left him exhausted. Losing his battle against sleep his eyes close for a final time. His hand loosens against mine and drops lifelessly to the bed. I stand up and pull the blankets securely around him. "Rest well…Sirius" I whisper softly.

A painful gasp from across the room takes my notice and I make my way over to where the three boys are being treated. Madam Pomfrey offers a tired smile as I approach, "the potions will do most of the work now, but we could use some help with cleaning and bandaging if you're up to it?" she questions.

"Just tell me where to begin," I reply. With a look of approval, she ushers me forward.

Noisy disorder eventually gave way to utter stillness, an eerie tranquility spread over the wounded boys as they enter a deep healing sleep.

Stretching, I place the unused bandages neatly back on the shelf. I look over the sleeping boys and can't help thinking this has been one helluva a weird night. Despite their initial appearance most of their wounds were not too severe, I overheard Madam Pomfrey speaking with the others earlier about their prognosis, "James, Peter, and Remis will be fine, the healing tonic will work over-night and they'll be good as new in the morning. Sirius will require at least two to three days rest in the Infirmary, but I expect a full recovery as well. Severus had some internal bruising along his arm and ribs not to mention the swelling around his eyes from the broken nose, he'll need at least two days of rest as well. Now will one of you tell me what happened!?" she asked in a demanding tone. Unfortunately, Dumbledore remembered my presence and suggested the conversation continue in Madam Pomfrey's office. _Whatever keep your secrets_ , I think meanly, watching them exit the Infirmary.

With them gone, I find myself standing over Severus' sleeping form, my stomach full of butterflies and my head buzzing with exhilaration. From the moment Madam Pomfrey said his name I couldn't stop thinking about him, what would I'd say to him, what would he say to me, how should I act... I've been hoping and fearing this moment since my arrival.

Staring intently down at him I notice he still has some dried blood covering his face. I quickly retrieve a small bowel of warm water and wash cloth. Sitting by his side I begin to gently wipe his face clean, slowly revealing a striking if not overly handsome face.

I'm suddenly startled by an unexpected voice growling roughly at me, "who are you?". A hand quickly snatches hold of my wrists holding them with an iron grasp. Onyx eyes drill into mine, my brain refuses to respond as I desperately try to find my voice, but I'm lost in bottomless pools of darkness. Staring becomes our only form of communication, our eyes locked. His face is rigid with tension as he demands again, "who are you?"

I shakily stammer out my name, "Everly. I'm Everly"

"This hardly tells me who you are" he sneers releasing his hold on my hands. He turns toward the sleeping boys at the other end of the room. He looks back at me with narrowed eyes, "will they recover?"

"Yes, Madam Pomfrey thinks most of them will be better by morning," I reply.

"Pity" he sighs with disappointment.

"You would wish them dead or dying then?" I snap at him accusingly.

"You do not get to judge me; you have no idea what they've put me through." He hisses at me angrily.

I stare into his endless black eyes, sorrow and pain swimming within their depths. Compassion for him fills me completely, I grasp his hand lightly and whisper. "I'm sorry. Your right I have no place to judge."

He looks back at me with an expression of stunned surprise. His gaze softens as he continues to gaze at me not breaking eye contact. I lean closer and gently continue wiping his face, he silently watches me with confusion. "Who are you?" he asks in wonderment. We both stare at each other transfixed, I can practically feel the air crackling between us.

The creaking of floorboards breaks our spell. I pull my eyes from his and scramble to stand when I see an exhausted Madam Pomfrey making her way toward us.

She hands me a small bottle, "Drink up. Time to get your rest too". Her kind yet demanding tone told me there would be no protesting. Lifting the bottle to my lips I drain its contents before giving it back. Maneuvering herself between Severus and I she is now blocking him from my view. "Alright then off to bed with you, I'll take care of young Severus." she says sternly directing me to my bed. "Thank you, Everly… for your help tonight", she adds softly handing me a clean night shirt and pants. The privacy screen is suddenly pushed between the beds before I can say anything in response.

I sigh sadly at losing my time with Severus so abruptly. Resigned I change into the fresh pajamas and climb into bed. Fatigued by the nights events I feel myself quickly falling asleep, my last thoughts are of tomorrow and beautiful midnight eyes.


	4. Sleeping Beauty

**Half a Life Without You**

 **Chapter 4: Sleeping Beauty**

 **Severus's POV** **:**

Slowing regaining consciousness, I became aware of the soothing touch of a warm cloth rubbing lightly against my cheek. The calm rhythmic motions quiet my hectic confusion from spiraling out of control. I resist the temptation to forcefully push myself awake, allowing my groggy brain time to adjust as the dense fog of sleep slowly lifts.

Once the haze enveloping me begins to clear, memories rapidly surge forth drowning me with their strength. Instantly, I remember with crystal clear clarity what happened and what I had done. I recall my feelings of triumph at seeing my enemies fall to the ground, but now… trepidation creeps over me as I consider the aftermath of my actions. _What have I done_? _Was this regret? Guilt? Remorse?_ Emotions I would never have anticipated feeling after achieving victory over my tormentors. _I just wanted it to stop_ , _wanted to teach them a lesson_ … _but at what cost_?

The weightless caress of the cloth across my nose distracts from the heavy thoughts weighing on me. I'm curious and suspicious by the overly gentle administrations, obviously not Madam Pomfrey, she wouldn't have the patience. Her direct no-nonsense approach did not fit with the sensitive precautions my current caregiver applied over my bruised and tender nose. Careful to not reveal I'm awake, I peek covertly through my lashes trying to catch a glimpse of the stranger taking such tender care over me.

My breath catches as shock ripples over me, nothing prepares me for _her_. I couldn't have torn my eyes away if my life depended on it. Delicate almost angelic features hold be captivated. It's her eyes that fascinate me the most, amber centers surrounded by a pale silvery blue gradually darkening into rings of the darkest blue. They are truly beautiful almost appear to glow with an inner power.

Her long blonde hair just a shade darker than a winter snow is streaked with an array of golden hues. Cascading in waves over her shoulder it sweeps faintly against my hand as she continues to clean my face. Spellbound, I'm not sure how much time passes as I lay there studying her, unable to pull my eyes away. I notice how tiny she is curled next to me, and a wave of possessiveness and protectiveness sweeps over me… _MINE._

Disbelief registers, I'm startled and worried by my reaction to this girl, this stranger. _How dare she make me feel this way?_ Still I feel an overwhelming urge to reach out and run my fingers through her hair and kiss her lips. _NO!_ _this must stop now!_ I scream at myself. I decide to 'wake up' needing to distance myself, not sure how much more I can bear her sweet touches without doing something I'll regret.

My voice comes out rough, "Who are you?' I demand. I watch her jump in surprise, the cloth slapping me in the face as she pulls away. I quickly grab her hands to make sure I'm not hit again; both her wrists are easily restrained within one of my hands. This only reminds me how tiny she is, and I want nothing more than to pull her close and protect her forever. Her eyes bore into mine; it feels like she can see right into my soul. In that moment, I want nothing more than to invite her into my soul… into my heart… _Huh?! What the fuck is wrong with me? Snap out of it!_ Shaking myself I pull free of my dangerous thoughts, "who are you?" practically growling the question at her now.

She shakily stammers out her name, "Everly. I'm Everly". My first instinct is to tell her it's beautiful like her, _Ugh, why am I such a fool?_ Frightened by these thoughts, Iwrap the familiar cloak of disdain tightly around me, my invisible shield protecting me against unwanted feelings. An image of Lily walking away from me flickers through my mind, and I know if it can guard me against those deep wounds it will keep _**her**_ away as well.

"This hardly tells me who you are" I sneer and release my hold on her hands needing more distance between us.

I look over the room and remember my earlier worries, "will they recover?" I ask indifferently, when I'm anything but indifferent. Holding my breath, I wait for her response.

"Yes, Madam Pomfrey thinks most of them will be better by morning," she replies.

"Pity" I respond with pretend displeasure while letting out a breath of relief.

A look of disbelief flashes across her face, "you would wish them dead or dying then?" she snaps accusingly at me.

Now I'm angry, _who is she to judge me_ , "You do not get to judge me, you have no idea what they've put me through." I hiss menacingly. My anger quickly turns to sadness as I think about all those years of taunts, pranks, and then losing Lily to Potter.

I'm surprised when I feel a small hand lightly grab mine and hear her whisper. "I'm sorry. You're right I have no place to judge." Stunned by her compassion I can think of nothing to say.

She continues to stare into my eyes, and I feel my shield fall away, I'm helplessly fascinated with her. She leans closer and gently continues wiping my face, I silently watch her with confusion. "Who are you?" I whisper in wonderment. We both stare at each other transfixed, the air crackling with tension between us. _What would happen if I kiss her?_ My thoughts are interrupted by Madam Pomfrey's entrance and the spell between us broken.

I wait impatiently for Madam Pomfrey to leave the Infirmary, she checks in on the others and finally I hear her quietly whisper, "Nox" darkness blankets the room. I rip the covers off and stand up, I won't be staying here over night. I may be glad I didn't kill the bastards, but no way do I trust them not to retaliate while I sleep. Madam Pomfrey will be upset in the morning when she discovers me missing, especially since she gave me a sleep tonic, which I secretly spit out when her back was turned. Although… right now I really don't care if I upset her, still feeling slightly pissed. She told Everly "I'll take care of young Severus", her idea of _take care_ really needed some bloody work, she practically smacked the damn cloth onto my face rubbing away the rest of the blood, my poor nose still throbbed uncomfortably between my eyes as a result. The old witch could learn a few things from my sweet Everly… _my Everly, could she be mine?_ I scoff at myself. _What would a girl like that want with me?_

Thinking of Everly, I look over at the privacy screen dividing our beds. My body moves under its own fruition and before I realize it, I'm standing over her. She looks like a princess from one of the muggle fairytales my mother used to read to me… _Sleeping Beauty_. I secretly wonder if she would awake if I kissed her soft rose lips. _You're hardly prince charming in this story, more like the monster who captured her._ I think humorlessly. Even with my last thought, I can't help myself and trace my fingertips across her cheek brushing her silky hair behind her ear.

Reluctantly, I pull away and place the screen between us once again. I battle against an inexplicable pull to be near her and force myself to walk away. I hesitate briefly as I reach the doors, looking back longingly to where I know she's sleeping before finally disappearing down the darkened corridor.


	5. Meeting the Marauders

**Half a Life Without You**

 **Chapter 5: Meeting the Mauraders**

 **Everly's POV**

The sounds of carefree laughing gently stir me awake. I can hear it lightly echoing through the room and can't help thinking what a vast improvement it is when compared to waking up to screams. Above the obvious merriment a voice _whispers_ loudly…" Bloody hell Prongs do shut-up you're going to wake her up!"

"I rather thought that was the point Pads? After all you have been talking about her all morning", an amused Prongs retorts.

I can hear Prongs proceed to mockingly repeat some of what Pads apparently said before I was awake. "Mate, you'll never believe it I met an angel…she's so beautiful, she has the loveliest blue eyes, she's got the softest voice." The sing song mocking is abruptly interrupted when I hear what I'm sure is the sound of a pillow being smashed against someone's head. "Ouch! I'm only joking Pads." Prongs laughs sounding slightly muffled.

A smile spreads across my face as I try to smother my own laughter, without a doubt these are much better sounds. Happiness flows through me when I hear another giggle, and possibly another pillow hitting someone. My smile gradually dims as a smidgen of concern over what I just overheard filters through my mind. _Pads aka Sirius Black cannot have crush on me, but what if he does?_ I frown at my wayward thoughts.

I jump in surprise when Madam Pomfrey unexpectedly pokes her heard around the privacy screen. She smiles brightly and briskly pulls a table over, "good morning. "I brought you a nice breakfast to begin your day… I expect you to eat it all." She adds sternly while propping the pillows up behind my back.

Wordlessly I grab a piece of toast from the plate and bite into it. She nods at me with approval and leaves me to enjoy my breakfast. I sit back peacefully eating, the warm morning light trickles across the bed warming the blankets. I soak it in enjoying the moment, allowing all my concerns to drift away.

My thoughts eventually stray to _**him**_ , and I wonder if he's still in the bed next to mine. The memory of his captivating black eyes float through my mind, I sigh with longing, eager to see him again. Then another memory comes along and ruins it …me…staring at him like a dummy, unable to talk. I lightly slap my palm over my face and shake my head, "ugh" I softly groan into my hand with embarrassment. "I'm an idiot." I grumble.

Madam Pomfrey suddenly appears from behind the screen again, "Everything alright dear?" she inquires looking me over with concern. I jump again at her sudden appearance.

"Yeah, I'm fine." I tell her reassuringly, while thinking she needs to start wearing a bell to warn people of her approach.

"Wonderful, are you up to visiting? The boys are eager to meet the girl who helped look after them last night." She looks at me expectantly, waiting for my answer.

My breath catches, and I can't help wondering if Severus will be one of the boys. "Sure, I just need to get dressed and then I'd love to meet everyone." I reply with a smile.

"Of course, your… _clothes_ …have been laundered and are folded in the drawer". Her obvious distaste over my clothing is not lost on me, "I'll have to speak with Dumbledore about getting you some proper attire during your visit with us, but until then your… um…muggle… clothes will have to do. Take your time, I'll let them know you'll be over soon." She says briskly grabbing my empty food tray and disappearing around the screen once again.

Giddy excitement fills me at the possibility of seeing him again, my earlier embarrassment pushed to the side. I throw my legs over the side opening the drawer to pull out my… _muggle…_ jeans and black t-shirt. I put my jeans on and then reach for my t-shirt but freeze when I look at it… _fuuuuuuuck! How could I have forgetten about this?_ Across the front written in bold letters are the words **I SOLEMNLY SWEAR THAT I AM UP TO NO GOOD** , the back is no better, little foot prints march around the words **MISCHEIF MANAGED**. _Oh my God! What am I going to do? This is from the Marauders map, and the actual Marauders are just feet away,_ I flop back on to the bed throwing my arms over my head, and then I start to silently shake with laughter, tears gather in the corners of my eyes. My breath comes out in gasps as I try to choke back the hysterical laughter, my ribs hurting now with the effort to stop. Of all the things to worry about my wardrobe wasn't on my list. I envision myself trying to explain Harry Potter merchandise to the boys, when another thought thankfully pops into my head, _I'll just turn it inside out!_ Finally, with my laughter under control I flip the shirt inside out and to my relief it works! You can't even really tell it's not made this way, it looks just like a plain old black shirt with the tag easily hidden behind my hair. Pleased with my improvised outfit, although silently vowing to burn it later, I make my way out from behind the screen and walk toward the now silent boys watching my approach with curious stares.

A boy with unruly dark hair and glasses is the first to speak, "Hi, I'm James" his hazel eyes sparkling with mirth. Gesturing his hand towards Sirius he begins introducing everyone, "This is Sirius, who tells me you two already met last night" ignoring the glare from Sirius he smiles and points to a pale boy with dark blonde hair and three scars across his face, "This is Remis". Remis gives me a small wave and a shy smile before James moves to the last boy, "Last, but not least is Peter" Peter also waves and smiles at me, but something about his smile creeps me out and I really don't like the look in his eyes when he glances at me, I shudder and look away.

"I'm Everly. It's really nice to meet you all" I say before adding a little wave of my own. I look around and notice Severus isn't here. "Wasn't there another boy here last night?" I question hoping they'll know where he is.

"Yeah, the bastard was gone before we got up. Probably off somewhere plotting." Sirius fumed.

I frown at Sirius not appreciating his remarks about Severus. "Sorry love, I didn't mean to snap. There's a lot of history there and I shouldn't have made you uncomfortable." Sirius apologizes. "Forgive me?" he questions hopefully and raises his hand to me.

I place my hand in his, "You're forgiven" I say reassuringly. He flashes me a brilliant smile squeezing my hand. "You can sit next to me." He says and shifts over to make room next to him on the bed. I can feel my cheeks warming as I sit beside him. The others quickly pull up chairs and then the questions start flying in.

"Are you a transfer student? Why are you in the Infirmary? Where are you from? Do you have a boyfriend? They all blurt out simultaneously. I blush at that last question I'm pretty sure Sirius asked.

My thoughts whirl as I think of the best way to answer their questions, _what should I say, it's not like I've had time to prepare a cover story yet. Breath, just breath. Here goes nothing._ I take a deep breath before responding, _"_ I'm here to discuss a possible transfer to Hogwarts, but unfortunately I got… sick… once I arrived. My… _parents_ … are constantly moving, I doubt I've been in one place long enough to call somewhere home. Lastly, no…I don't have a boyfriend." I answer, careful to avoid eye contact with Sirius as I answer the last question. _I seriously need to talk more with Dumbledore about my cover story._ "Tell me more about Hogwarts, _**if**_ I'm to transfer here I'd like to know more about it." I say before they have a chance to ask anything else.

Over the next hour they all happily launch into a variety of stories about their time at Hogwarts, I couldn't remember the last time I laughed so much. No wonder they were notorious for their antics. Soon the conversation falls to quidditch, Sirius, James, and Peter were currently having a good-natured debate over the best position to play. Remis sits back watching with amusement while shaking his head at them.

Without warning a pain flares up in my chest radiating through my arms and then down into my legs, the pain steadily starts growing and a cold sweat breaks out across my forehead. I look up seeing the three boys still happily arguing before my eyes met Remis's concerned ones, "Everly, are you ok?"

All talking immediately stops, everyone's attention now focused on me, "I think I just need to lay down for little bit" I whisper and begin to stand. "Everly…" Sirius starts to say something, but as another wave of pain spreads through my body I can't hear him anymore and feel myself falling.

The burning pain sears through me increasing in waves with every breath, it feels like a thousand hot knives are cutting me everywhere. I distantly hear someone screaming in agony, then I realize it's me…I'm the one screaming.

I feel myself being lifted into strong arms and surprisingly my pain begins to lessen. I'm carefully placed onto a bed; the arms begin to pull away and my pain instantly starts to come back. "No, don't leave me!" I yell weakly.

Those same strong arms are quickly wrapped tightly around me again and the pain starts to ease once more. "Stay" I whisper shakily.

"I've got you, I'm not going anywhere." A deep voice replies, and my heart leaps.

"Thank you" I sigh before passing out.


	6. Connection

**Half a Life Without You**

 **Chapter 6: Connection**

 **Severus's POV:**

I couldn't have stopped even if I wanted to. My steps quietly resound through the long corridor, each step taking me closer to _**her**_. She haunts me, unable to escape the urge to seek her out. I'm no longer the master over my emotions, all I feel is the need to see her, talk with her, be with her.

The doors to the infirmary are now in my view, anticipation radiates throughout my body causing my limbs to tingle. This desire to be with her overrides any reservations I may have about Potter and his little gang still being there. They wouldn't dare try anything with Madam Pomfrey and Everly there. I boldly walk forward stopping just outside the entryway when the sounds of laughter fill the air around me. I curiously move forward to see who's laughing only to shrink back swiftly into the shadows, she's there…with them.

Pangs of sadness and loss rip through me causing me to stagger under their weight. Loneliness is something I've grown to embrace over the years, my inability to share love with another accepted long ago. I know I should walk away from her, from them, from everything, but the pull is still there urging me forward. I watch her smile up at Black as he lightly bumps her shoulder while affectionately patting her hand.

Jealousy replaces my earlier feelings of sadness. I want nothing more than to storm through the doors and pull her away from Black and the others. I see red when I watch Black playfully tweak her nose, and I find the thought of ripping his arm off appealing. _To think I regretted not killing the arsehole_. _She's supposed to be mine_ , but I know I'm being delusional, _she's not mine and will never be mine_. I turn away unable to bear the loss I feel, _can't lose something you never had_ , I think sadly. I fall back further into the shadows and begin to turn away.

Then all thoughts of leaving are abandoned when I hear Lupin's concerned voice, "Everly, are you ok?"

No one notices me entering the room, all eyes are focused on her now pale face. "I think I just need to lay down for little bit" I hear her whisper as she begins to stand unsteadily. Black reaches out to stop her "Everly wait…", but he's too late and she drops to the floor.

I push the others out of my path and crash to my knees next to her, she screams and screams her face twisting into a grimace of pain. Her back arches and she begins convulsing against the hard floor. She stares at me unseeing, her eyes robbed of all their warmth. She's being consumed by the pain, her suffering splinters me inside.

Pure instinct drives me to lift her into my arms. I gasp when feel energy vibrate between us, she stops screaming and her body calms from violent shaking to only slight quivers. Cradling her gently within my arms I stand and start to carry her towards her bed.

A hand pulls my shoulder roughly turning me around, "What the hell do you think you're doing!? Give her to me!" Black snaps angrily at me.

Before I can answer a frazzled Madam Pomfrey races over, "Oh No! Severus hurry and carry her over to the bed."

I glance back at Black, he's hanging heavily against Potter unable to even stand on his own yet, I smirk because we both know there's nothing, he can do about it. My small victory is forgotten when Everly whimpers softly in my arms. I pull her closer and carry her over to the little bed where Madam Pomfrey is now waiting.

I set her down very gently and begin to release my hold on her, when she calls out, "No, don't leave me!" in a small panicked voice. I instantly gather her back into my arms and wrap her tightly against me. "Stay" she whispers shakily. Wild centaurs couldn't take me from her side, "I've got you; I'm not going anywhere." I reassure her, my voice gruff with emotion.

"Thank… you" she whispers before going limp, her arms fall away to hang loosely at her sides. Panic rips through me like a knife to my stomach, until I feel the soft beating of her heart against my body assuring me, she's still alive. I breathe a sigh of relief against her hair and lean in close enough my lips brush against her ear, "don't _**you**_ leave me, little one".

"Get your big nose away from her." I look up to see Black hobbling over with the assistance from Potter and Lupin, Pettigrew scampers behind them as usual. Once he's standing in front of me, he immediately reaches out trying to pull Everly from my arms.

"Try it and I'll break the other leg!" I snarl, completely enraged by his audacity. He flinches backward, staggering against a wide-eyed Lupin, while Potter steps forward menacingly.

"ENOUGH!" Madam Pomfrey thunders. "Mr. Potter please help Mr. Black back to his bed, and since the rest of you appear to be fully recovered you may return to your dormitories, I do NOT have time for such nonsense!" She emphasizes her point by placing her hand against Everly's pale clammy cheek.

Black leans down next to my ear, "This isn't over Snivellus." He whispers warningly before limping off with the others.

Madam Pomfrey suddenly waves her wand, "Expecto Patronum", a silvery white spark erupts from the tip taking the shape of a tiny chipmunk, "Professor Dumbledore I need you to come to the infirmary immediately, there's a situation with our visitor. Go on now deliver your message." She directs it sternly. It wastes no time bolting quickly from the room, off to deliver its message.

It doesn't take long before Dumbledore is hastily entering through the infirmary doors, his robes swishing noisily around his ankles, his fast pace creating little gust of wind causing his hair to sweep dramatically behind him as he walks to the end of Everly's bed.

He worriedly looks down into her colorless face, "what happened?" he questions looking between me and Madam Pomfrey. He listens intently as we explain, looking very intrigued by the connection I'm describing. "Curious, very curious" he mutters as I continue explaining what occurred up until I felt the first spark of energy surge through me.

"Are you experiencing any pain or discomfort from the connection?" he asks in return.

"No, it's not painful." I answer softly, my expression surely conveying I would still be holding her even if it were painful. I press her closer into my body as I feel the link between us continue to drum lightly.

"Do you know what's wrong with her?" I ask glancing up.

He breathes out a long sigh that is both resigned and fatigued, "only theories and old stories, and hardly from what I would call the most reliable source." I watch intently as his eyes grow distant as if recalling a long-ago memory, a flicker of sadness passes quickly before he continues in his whisper soft voice, " _Velox Magicae Imperium_ , roughly translates to a rapid maturation of magical powers"

I can't help but scoff, "But that's just a…"

"a legend? Yes Mr. Snape I'm quite aware, but I've found over the years that even legends tend to be based on some small truths." He pauses staring down into Everly's pale face, "the truth. It is a beautiful and terrible thing and should therefore be treated with caution." His eyes now full of gentle concern find mine, "Which is why I must dig further into my research and discover what truths there are within the legends, and even within Everly herself."

I want to rage at him and demand to know something now, the legends I heard growing up were of the worst kind of monster, "Obscurus", the darkest magical power one could possibly imagine. I can't, I won't, believe the angel in my arms could become something so dark and dangerous.

My tumultuous thoughts are interrupted, "an Obscures is not the only possibility." I realize then I must have whispered the hated single word aloud in my horror. "There are…other possibilities."

My frustration over the situation finally spills over, and I explode, "What!? What are the other…possibilities?" My voice loudly booms through the room echoing off the high ceilings, earning a disapproving frown from Madam Pomfrey and an intrigued glare from Black, who has resorted to pouting from his bed at the other end of the infirmary. And of course, Dumbledore just fucking smiles at me, his eyes sparkling with humor.

Unfazed by my sudden outburst, he begins to explain, "there's another… lesser known legend about a wizard who was stolen at birth and raised in a world without any magic. It says he found his way back to the world of magic causing his own to surge forth rapidly. With the help of a witch he was able find balance during the worst of the abrupt onset of his powers. He was able to direct his excess magical energy into her, until the surge of power subsided within him, and balance returned to the wizard. The connection you are describing seems to confirm… _**this**_ theory. I do believe she'll recover and in fact I believe you should begin to notice the connection starting to weaken as her body becomes balanced."

I frown as I listen to him go on about legends, how can someone be raised in a world without any magic, and why the fuck had I never heard this story before? He was right about the connection though; I do feel it fading. It's still all legends and theories though, what if it means she's getting worse not better.

"Severus…look at her. She's getting color back in her cheeks, breathing easier, and no longer grimacing with pain. She is getting better; we will see her recovered from this… I assure you." he promises me.

"Mr. Snape try letting her go, I want to see if she's recovered enough to rest on her own." Madam Pomfrey says stepping forward suddenly. I'm ready to protest, but I feel Dumbledore place a hand on my shoulder nodding his head. I reluctantly move away watching Everly closely for any hint of pain. When she continues resting peacefully, I'm relieved but also feel the loss of no longer having her within my arms.

"Come along Severus, Miss Quinn needs to rest, and I have some more research to review so I may keep my promise to you and see her recovered." Dumbledore says as he motions for me to come with him.

"Miss Quinn?" I ask stupidly

"Yes, Miss Everly Quinn." He answers.

My eyes are drawn to the beautiful girl on the bed, now sleeping serenely. Since the moment I saw her she has been a constant in my thoughts. I can't help wondering, how I can feel so much for someone I don't really know. In fact, I just learned her last name, which only emphasizes how little I know about her.

Madam Pomfrey noticed my hesitation, "Don't worry, I'll watch over her. I'll also be setting up wards to alert me immediately when she awakens or if there should be another incident. I'll notify you right away when she is well enough to receive visitors, or should she require any more of your assistance." She says reassuringly.

I'm reluctant to leave but nod my head in agreement. I turn toward Dumbledore and stare right into his light blue eyes; _I'll be holding you to your promise…old man_. A twinkle lights up his eyes at my silent words and inclines his head my way before I turn to exit.

I must unfortunately walk past a scowling Black on my way out, "She'll never choose you." He sneers cruelly. My steps faulter for a second, but not wanting to give him the satisfaction of a response I continue forward past him into the hall, letting the dark shadows envelope me.


	7. Truce

**Half a Life Without You**

 **Chapter 7: "Truce"**

 **Severus's POV:**

 _I'm exhausted as hell_ , I feel as if all the energy has been drained from me completely. I trudge slowly up the Slytherin tower, eager for sleep. Stepping tiredly into my room I drop heavily onto the four-poster bed, my eyes close instantly and I sink deeply into the soft mattress.

Instead of falling into a blissful sleep my mind fills up with images from the past two days, refusing to allow my overly stressed body to relax.

Sighing in frustration, I stare blankly at the plush velvet curtains draped lavishly around my bed. The material snakes elegantly around each pole, small intricate designs meticulously stitched into the silver and jade fabric. A soft breeze sweeps into the room causing the curtains to billow and swirl overhead like storm clouds.

I try closing my eyes once again, "Oi, Snape!" My eyes pop open to see Regulus Black striding confidently into the room. "What?" I growl at him.

His eyes widen slightly at my tone before replying with a clipped upper-class accent, "Professor Slughorn wishes to see you straight away in his office."

I watch him move arrogantly past me to sit at the desk, his movements precise and posture perfectly ridged. Proper etiquette and manners having been ingrained in him since birth, the result of being born into one of the most powerful pure blood families in the wizarding world.

"Thank you" I mutter finally.

He only shrugs and pulls a book from his bag. "Do you know why he wants to see you?" He asks with all the curiosity and calculation of a true Slytherin.

Too tired to say more, I only utter a single word. "No". I turn away and close my eyes once more effectively ending any further conversation.

The desk chair scratches loudly against the floor, angry stomps exit the room taking Regulus with them. I cringe when a jarring echo resounds through the room as he descends the short spiral staircase back to the common room. _Great, just great. Why can't everyone just leave me the fuck alone, is it so much to ask?_ Sighing, I rub my hands over my face in irritation.

Knowing I can't delay the inevitable any longer, I swing my legs to the floor, head down the recently abused staircase, through the common room, and down to the dungeons.

I move briskly along the cold narrow passages, the flaming torches lining the walls do little to warm the chilled air. I easily navigate the maze of passages and tight spiral staircases finally reaching my destination.

Slughorn's office sits behind a massive white oak door, the Slytherin insignia scorched ornately into its center. I reach out and rap sharply against it. "Enter", I hear a muffled voice call out from the other side.

I step into the office only to see Professor Slughorn peek his head out from behind a small opening in the back corner, "Mr. Snape come in, come in, I'll be with you in just a moment." His head disappears back around the corner as suddenly as it had appeared.

My eyes travel over the windowless office as I stand awkwardly waiting for his return. I notice the dark green walls have been updated since my last visit. They are now covered in a lime green wallpaper decoratively patterned with cobra lilies. Golden tapestries hang elegantly along the newly patterned walls, embroidered figures of wizards and witches move around it magically reenacting various ancient wizarding battles. Their stitched wands create little green and white flashes that spark sporadically around the room as they cast spells at one another.

Stacks of books clutter the spaces along every wall and corner, even the giant mahogany desk dominating the center of the room has stacks of books covering every inch of its open space. Several tiny black cauldrons are balanced precariously on top of the books littered across it, each overflowing with dozens of quills and stirring sticks.

My observations are broken as Professor Slughorn dashes into the room, "So sorry to keep you waiting. Please have a seat." He gestures over to a small seating area located in front of an enormous, but beautifully unique, fireplace. A pure white marble mantle fades seamlessly into deep ebony columns. Two large serpents weave majestically around them, their white scaled bodies standing out starkly against the dark ebony. Their heads rest regally on top of the mantle, looking out over the room with menacing yellow glass eyes.

We settle into a pair of dark burgundy colored wingback chairs flanking the fireplace. I anxiously run my hands along the smooth gold buttons sewn into the leather trim. My feet sink deeply into the dark green shagged carpet, _wait_ _ **shag**_ _carpet._ I can't help from raising my eyebrows.

Chuckling at my bemused expression, "It's a muggle decoration, a former student gifted it to me just this past Christmas."

"My parents actually have a brown shag carpet at home, it was just surprising to see here."

"Ah, right. Your half-blood, muggle father if I remember."

"Yes sir" I reply stiffly.

"Tea?" he asks

Before I can answer a loud pop sounds in the room, a little house elf carrying a silver tray almost as big as she is, appears next to Professor Slughorn. She sets the tray carefully down on the coffee table between our chairs.

Slughorn reaches out grabbing a steaming cup, "Thank you Zillah, right on time."

Zillah blushes and dips her head shyly, "Zillah is pleased to be of service. Is there anything else Zillah can do for master Slughorn?"

Slughorn waves his hand dismissively, "No, no that will be all".

Another pop sounds, and with it Zillah disappears.

"I presume you know why I've called you here tonight Mr. Snape?" He asks before sipping his tea, carefully watching me over the rim of his cup.

My first thought is of Everly, _does she need me again has something else happened?_ "Is everything ok with Everly, sir? Do they need me back in the infirmary?" I grip the armrest prepared to launch myself from the chair.

He frowns in confusion, "Who?"

"Everly, the girl who helped the night of" … _ugh, I'm a fool he wants to discuss what happened last night with Potter and his idiot friends._

Awareness lights up his face, "yes, yes I remember her. Lovely girl. I heard she had an episode this morning, terrible news to be sure… I'm sure she'll be fine, nothing to worry over young man." He smiles reassuringly taking another sip before placing it back on the tray, "I'm afraid the matter I wish to discuss _**only**_ concerns the events which occurred prior to you and the others requiring her assistance."

A calculating gleam suddenly appears in his eyes, "Mr. Snape before we get into the details of what transpired that night, I want to make you aware of a rather interesting conversation Professor Dumbledore and I had today. We believe this whole messy affair can be resolved in a way everyone will find…uh…let's say…mutually beneficial." His smug tone shows he's exceptionally pleased with himself.

I'm instantly suspicious and intrigued by the type of _agreement_ they've made. I have my doubts _**everyone**_ will find it mutually beneficial, but I remain quiet and continue listening intently as Slughorn goes into more detail.

"A contract will be drawn up detailing out a truce between yourself, Mr. Potter, Black, Lupin, and Pettigrew."

When I hear the word truce I can't help but interrupt, "What exactly are the details of this… truce?" I ask with narrowed eyes.

He crosses his legs appearing untroubled, "Not to worry, not to worry. I promise you will be pleased. However, you must wait until tomorrow as the details are still being put together. I do know each of you will be required to sign the contract, and _**if**_ any of terms agreed to are violated it can lead to severe punishment including the possibility of immediate expulsion."

I slouch back into the chair, "I don't have a choice, do I?"

He shakes his head, "No, Mr. Snape you do not...if you wish to remain at Hogwarts that is"

I want nothing more than to walk out of the door and never return, but I have nowhere else to go - my parents - are not an option I'm willing to entertain, plus now I couldn't imagine leaving here without _her_.

"When do we get to _actually_ review the terms?" I ask in resignation.

"Tomorrow morning at 8 o'clock sharp in Headmaster Dippet's office."

I frown in confusion, Headmaster Dippet hasn't been back to Hogwarts since the end of last term due to health reasons. "Wait, I thought Professor Dumbledore was taking over as headmaster?"

He reaches for his cup again before replying, "Yes, he will be, _**however**_ , until the end of this school year Headmaster Dippet is _**officially**_ still the Headmaster andit's technically still his office. It's just proper to continue calling it his office…for now".

I resist the urge to roll my eyes at Slughorn's adherence to such absurd formality when it's practically Dumbledore's office now.

Unexpectedly, he hands me a piece of parchment and quill, "I will…uh… need your written testimony of the events."

"May I ask why? _**If**_ you and Professor Dumbledore already have a…mutually beneficial solution planned?" I ask, unable to keep the bitterness from dripping over my words.

He fretfully twists his cup on the little saucer he's holding, "It's just a formality I insisted on." _Here we go again with the fucking formalities,_ my thoughts are interrupted when he adds more, "also, it will be used to determine level of…guilt."

I can't stop the glower from darkening my face, "Guilt?" I whisper dangerously.

He shifts uncomfortably and titters nervously, "In addition to the truce each student involved will be given a separate punishment for their individual… crimes."

He holds his hand up to stop me from saying anything, "now before you say anything, let me assure you the punishment will be determined by the student's head of house. Between us… there is absolutely nothing to worry over seeing as I am _**your**_ head of house." He replies with smug confidence once again.

His assurances fall short for me and a pit of dread settles in my stomach just thinking about the possible outcomes tomorrow may bring. Anything is possible when it comes to Dumbledore, I for one do not trust him when it comes to deciding my fate.

Slughorn stands up and stretches, "Right then, I'll just leave you to it. You can bring over your completed written testimony when you're finished." I watch him walk over to his desk before turning back to face the fireplace, the hot flames coil around wooden logs turning them to black ash. Flickering light illuminates the snake's yellow eyes causing them to glow sinisterly down at me. An icy chill runs over me despite the warmth being produced from the crimson embers. I manage to tear my eyes away from their hypnotic stare and look down at the blank parchment in my hands.

Reluctantly, I begin to write out my testimony of what occurred that night, the night I met her… _ **my**_ Everly, I smile at the thought as I continue writing.

 _ **Next morning…**_

I hesitantly approach the imposing gargoyle guarding the entrance to the headmaster's office. A stone griffin dominates the circular entry way, its massive wings spread wide as if preparing to attack. The noble creature almost appears to be watching me, assessing my intent as I draw closer.

My voice trembles slightly as I say the password, "Cherry Crunch Bars".

The stone giant rotates reveling a curved staircase, as I head up the stairs I can hear raised voices coming from the headmaster's office.

"How could you Albus!? I have every right to be part of this decision as you and Horace."

"Minerva while I understand you're upset…"

"Upset! Upset! I'm well past upset", her screeching words cause me to pause my ascension, the right thing would be to make my presence known, but instead I draw back against the wall and listen.

Dumbledore's firm voice cuts her words off mid rant. "It's been decided, there will be a truce signed between them today. The _**current**_ head of house will decide additional punishments as they deem necessary." His words while spoken quietly, were said with an air of finality effectively silencing anymore protest.

I heard the gargoyle begin to shift behind me and took that as my queue to continue up. I quicken my steps and knock briefly on the partially opened door before entering.

Dumbledore greets me with a mischievous smile, "Good morning Mr. Snape, good of you to join us."

 _Did he know I was listening?_ the knowing glint in his eyes gives me my answer.

McGonagall still agitated by her earlier conversation simply sneers in my direction before looking away.

Professor Slughorn enters right behind me his breathing heavy from his journey up from the dungeons. He claps his hand on my shoulder, "Are you ready my boy?"

I shrug my shoulder hoping it will dislodge his hand, "Yes, sir."

He walks over to the other two professors oblivious to the tension exuding from McGonagall, if glares could kill Slughorn would collapse dead where he stood.

"Where are the other boys Minerva?" Slughorn asks still ignorant of her mood.

She glances over at Dumbledore before giving out a resigned sigh, "They'll be here shortly, I wanted a word with our _**acting**_ headmaster before the meeting began." She replied curtly.

Slughorn grins, his hands clapping together in anticipation. "Wonderful, I'm _exceptionally_ pleased we'll be working this out", giddy joy evident in his voice as he rocks back and forth on his heels in his eagerness.

McGonagall's eyes narrow into tiny slits, her mouth pressing into an extremely thin line while her hands curl into balls by her side. I can practically feel the anger radiating from her in waves.

Slughorn still oblivious, doesn't understand how dangerous his smug smile is to his health in this moment. An image of McGonagall choking him with his ridiculous silk cravat flashes through my mind _, it would probably be no less than he deserves,_ I think spitefully. However, she simply walks over to the window facing away from us, her hands continuously clenching and unclenching the only observable indication of her anger.

All too soon the others join us, it becomes clear they weren't given the same pre-warning I was awarded the night before.

Black and Potter's obnoxious voices ring out in unison, "He bloody well could have killed us with that Confringo spell! How can we be expected to…"

"SILENCE!" Dumbledore's normally quiet voice booms over the room, hushing everyone immediately. "This is not up for discussion, I'm also _**fully**_ aware of the events leading up to the spell being cast." throwing a meaningful look their way.

Lupin lowers his head in shame darting a quick glance my way, apparently, he's still upset it was his spell that broke my nose. _Good, he should feel bad. It still fucking hurt_. I absently touch my bruised nose glaring back at him in return.

Potter and Black have the decency to at least appear properly chastised, if not truly sorry for their part. Pettigrew only slinks further back into the corner trying to avoid detection. I purposely turn my glare his way. He lets out a high-pitched squeak when he notices me watching him. _Fucking shifty rat, go on hide in your corner coward. How in the hell is he a Gryffindor?_ I wonder, and not for the first time either.

Dumbledore's voice calls back my attention, "I will now review the terms of the truce, if you do not agree to sign the contract you will be asked to leave Hogwarts grounds immediately, is that clear?"

I can hear gasps of disbelief coming from the others, I stand quietly ignoring their sounds of protest. I'm just eager to get on with it, sooner we sign the sooner I can go and check on Everly.

Black's voice interrupts my thought, "why are you so calm about all this Snape?" he asks demandingly.

I simply sneer at him, sending him a silent _Fuck You_ look, causing his face to turn red. I replace my sneer with a condescending smirk when I see his reaction, which only produces a deeper shade of crimson to spread over his arrogant face. Potter grabs his shoulder redirecting his attention back to Dumbledore, who has been silently watching our interaction with amused interest.

Dumbledore raises his eyebrows as if to ask if we're done so he may continue. Once he's assured all our attention is now focused back on him he begins to read the terms of the truce.

"The following are the terms of the contract"

Any spell / hex cast with the intention to harm and/or maim will be a violation resulting in immediate expulsion. Note: The ONLY exception will be spells cast while attending Defense Against the Dark Arts or Dueling class, these spells are allowed as they are supervised by a professor.

Any magically charmed item or potion given to another with the intention to harm will be a violation resulting in immediate expulsion. Note: There are NO exceptions to this rule.

Any physical altercation (examples: punching, pushing, tripping) will result in punishment, which will be determined by perpetrator's head of house based on the action committed and severity of injury incurred.

Any verbal name calling, or mocking is considered a violation to the truce agreement and will require a public apology plus detention.

Dumbledore pauses to examine our reactions, "are there any questions?" he asks with his whisper soft voice. Everyone remains silent as he scans the room staring intently at each of us before speaking again, "very well, in the absence of any additional questions… I find I must provide a couple clarifications to ensure absolute transparency of the agreement in which you will shortly find yourselves bound to. First, this contract will remain valid **only** during the time you attend Hogwarts, it will become void the day **after** your graduate."

He pauses to see our reactions; the significance of the contract's expiration date is not lost on me nor is it lost on Black and Potter by the deep frowns now etched into their faces. Dumbledore gives me a small smile and a barely perceptible nod before continuing.

"Secondly, with all magically binding contracts a protection spell is woven into the agreement."

 _Huh? What does a protection spell have to do_ …my inner questions are cut off by Dumbledore's next words, "I can see by your confused faces you do not understand the significance of the protection spell. The easiest way to explain its… purpose… is to simply say it helps you keep your word by **protecting** you from yourself. Should you find yourself tempted to break your word, a gentle…reminder…will be provided. Now I hope I do not need to go over the types of reminders a protection spell can be capable of, but if you need… _reminding_ …now is the time to ask your questions."

I kept my silence as did the others, protection spells could be unpredictable in the quest to guard those under its spell. Any culprit daring enough to go against it could expect something as minor as a forceful shove to being seriously wounded, only the wizard who enacted the spell knew the extent of the consequences. If we had a question, it would only be how far the spell could be pushed without issuing a reminder, but this was only information Dumbledore possessed and would never provide to us.

"Are there any questions?" he asks once again. When no one says anything, he reaches for a golden quill and holds it out to me, "Mr. Snape you may be the first to sign." Taking the pen from his hands I scratch my name at the bottom of the contract. Once we've all signed, Dumbledore returns the golden quill back to his desk looking pleased by everyone's agreement to sign.

He then turns to face us, a new calculating gleam shines in his eyes as he looks us over. I tense in preparation for what he's about to say, "As you know in addition to the truce agreement there was discussion around individual punishments. As the head of house for Gryffindor, I'll be delivering the punishments for my house first and then Slughorn will do so for Slytherin."

"Mr. Lupin please step forward." Lupin jolts unexpectedly at hearing his name called first, he steps nervously forward until his standing directly in front of Dumbledore.

"Mr. Lupin, you will serve one-month detention at the start of the new year and will be required to return to Hogwarts four weeks before term begins to tutor a younger student, Miss Beatrice Humphrey, who will be entering her third year."

Next to me, I can hear Potter whisper over to Black, "isn't she the girl who accidently performed a glowing spell on herself?" Black sniggers, "yeah, she didn't need candles for a month." Potter coughs into his hand trying to cover up a laugh. Lupin glares over at his friends unamused. They only shrug at him innocently.

"Mr. Potter you're next please step forward. You will also be given one-month detention at the start of the new year and will be required to return to Hogwarts four weeks before term begins to tutor a younger student, Mr. Xander McCullough, who will be entering his fourth year."

Black lets out a short cackle of laughter, "Isn't he the bloke that miniaturized his wand in Charms class?"

"Yeah, I heard they never did find it." Pettigrew's squeaky voice adds from the corner.

Dumbledore's mouth twitches with amusement, "yes, the important part is he will have a new wand before your lessons begin, that is all Mr. Potter. Mr. Black you're next please come forward."

"Laugh it up Padfoot, it's your turn." Potter says with delight as he walks past.

Still fighting his own smile Dumbledore continues, "Mr. Black, as with your other housemates you will be given one-month detention at the start of the new year and will be required to return to Hogwarts four weeks before term begins to tutor a younger student, Mr. Cornelius Holiday, who will be entering his fifth year."

Potter slaps Black on the back with unrestrained glee causing him stumble, "Hey Pads, isn't he the one who had the… _incident_ …in flying class?". The whole room erupts into giggles, I want to stay straight faced but find I can't help letting out a short laugh despite myself, even stuffy Professor McGonagall is smiling at the mention of poor little Cornelius.

As the laughter dies down Dumbledore's voice reaches our ears, "Mr. Black, you will also be asked to assist the student Slughorn will be assigning to Mr. Snape. She will need lots of practice to prepare for the upcoming year and it will be too much work for just one tutor." Black only mumbles and goes to stand back beside Potter and Lupin.

 _I knew it, I'm getting the worst of the bunch_. I can't help wondering what kind of simpleton they are going to saddle me with.

"Lastly for my house, Mr. Pettigrew, you will serve the same one-month detention and will be required to return two weeks before term to assist Professor McGonagall in preparation for the first year's arrival."

Pettigrew throws a skittish glance at McGonagall before darting back to his corner. _Ha! Must be too stupid for tutoring,_ I think spitefully. McGonagall looks extremely displeased by the announcement, her stare over at Dumbledore holds the promise of a future _discussion_.

Adjusting a tightly fitted purple suede jacket over his belly, Slughorn finally steps forward to deliver my punishment and assign the idiot I'll be tutoring.

"Mr. Snape, you will receive a one-month detention at the new year will be given to you as well, and you'll also be required to return to Hogwarts six weeks before term begins to tutor a new Hogwarts student. However, if you agree to remain at Hogwarts during summer break to help tutor this student, you may skip the one-month detention at the start of the new year."

I'm doubtful remaining over the holiday to tutor an imbecile will be worth skipping a month's worth of detention. I first want to know more about who I'll be tutoring before agreeing. "May I ask who this new student is and what exactly I will be required to be tutoring them in?"

Slughorn smile grows wide, answering with relished cheerfulness, "Miss Everly Quinn will be a new 7th year student, you'll learn more about her background prior to beginning the tutoring sessions, but she will need help catching up in all areas."

My heart leaps and I nearly burst with eager excitement and anticipation. I rush to agree "yes, I will return stay and help, it's not a problem."

Black suddenly pushes his way up to the front, "I can stay over the summer and help with Everly's tutoring too." He says enthusiastically.

Dumbledore pleased by his announcement smiles in appreciation, "Good, you may assist me with the classes I have planned with her over the summer."

Black shoots me a look of triumph before joining his friends who are now busy clapping him on the back in celebration. I can only summon a half-hearted scowl at their antics, my thoughts now solely on her. Plus, he's only assisting with her classes, I get to have private lessons with her. _Wonder how long it will take him to figure that part out_ , I think smugly.

Before dismissing us, Dumbledore calls over Black and I for one final word, "I will ask you both to refrain from speaking about the tutoring sessions with Everly until I've had a chance to talk with her about it. As you know she's still recovering, so she is not yet been informed of these plans."

We both nod our agreements, and finally are dismissed. I hurriedly exit the headmaster's office and charge down the corridor, my brisk steps taking me closer to _her_.

In my rush to get there, I don't notice the footsteps following me.


	8. Visiting Schedule

**Half a Life Without You**

 **Chapter 8: Visiting Schedule**

 **Severus's POV**

I push my still tired body down the hall, quickening my steps when the Infirmary finally comes into view. I should be heading to my first lesson of the day, but my mind won't stop going over every moment I've spent with her and I feel an invisible force pushing me down the hall to her.

As I walk her words play over in my head again and again trying to piece together the puzzle of Everly Quinn. The mystery surrounding her gnaws at me and I can't help the flood of concern over her 'condition'. Who develops their magical powers so late in life? More importantly, what would the resulting damage be with such a late emergence? Was there any truth behind the legend Dumbledore told me? My silent pondering only increases my anxiety and overwhelming need to be by her side, the connection between us was intense and I oddly feel hollow without it. I'm not sure what scares me the most, my desperate attachment to someone I only just met or the danger of losing her to some unknown cause.

Dumbledore knows more than he's saying, and I can't help wanting to know what more 'research' he could possibly be doing…. _where are you getting your information old man?_ More questions dance through my head, distracting me from the shadow bearing down on me.

Before I can step through the infirmary doorway and hand grabs tightly onto my arm spinning me around. Black's face comes into view, his eyes narrowed with anger. "Where are you rushing off to Snivellus?" his voice shaking with barely restrained hostility.

I stare back at him coldly, "I do not answer to you…Black" His name drips from my tongue with disdain as I do my best to suppress the violent impulse to simply fling him aside. I can see Black's wand hand begin to shake under the restraint of the truce, apparently, he's not very good at suppressing his own violent impulses. The magic of the truce 'gently' reminds him of the vow he made only minutes ago, an invisible push causes him to slide awkwardly away from where I'm standing. Awareness of what's happening reaches his eyes and he growls out in frustration. He opens his mouth to say something else, but before he can say anything more Dumbledore's voice gently floats over to us, "How very… _fortunate_ … we all had a similar thought to venture to the infirmary this lovely morning?" His face is neutral as he slowly approaches, but as he gets closer, I can see it in his eyes… disappointment.

He spares us with a brief glance as he glides by his robes sway easily against the castle's stones. Black and I stare at each other awkwardly and hesitate for only a moment before following Dumbledore through the infirmary's doorway.

I slowly approach her bed and watch her deep even breathing, her hair is spilled out around her like a golden halo. Her cheeks are pink with color, and I can feel the tension in my shoulders loosen a bit, she looks healthy, so much better than the pale ghost from yesterday.

Heavy steps approaching grab my attention and I watch Black limping to the other side of her bed, his leg not allowing him to walk with his usual strut. I scowl over at him, but he only arches his brow at me and smirks. "what are you doing here?" I ask irritated.

"Now Snape is that any way to greet someone you just entered a truce with?" he asks with a pointed look over to where Dumbledore is currently speaking with Madam Pomfrey.

I can feel the tips of my ears burning as I fight back my frustration, as he stands there pretending, he wasn't the one to confront me in the hall. My quiet seething is interrupted when he continues to prattle with his annoyingly arrogant tone, "if you must know I consider Everly a friend and came to check on her, plus there's still the little thing with my leg…you know being broken. Madam Pomfrey wants to give me another round of potions, what's your excuse?"

The irrational part of me just wants to lash out senselessly and tell him to get away from her, that she doesn't need friends like him. But I know it's me she doesn't need friends like. My anger gives way to my own self-doubt, _why am I here, I'm not the friend for her._ Despite my thoughts I know I cannot leave and finally relent and answer Black. "I was concerned as well and thought to check in after her."

Black simply nodded, "we'll need a visiting schedule, truce or not I doubt either of us will remain civil for very long."

His humorless expression leaves little doubt he's serious, I snort with disdain "You want to me to… _schedule_ … when I'm… _allowed_ … to see her?"

"Think about it Snape, it's the only way this truce will actually last. I personally don't want you within the same room with ME let alone EVERLY." He took a long breath and lowered his voice, which had risen more and more has he spoke.

If my urge to punch his arrogant face was as strong as his urge to hit me, then he was right, it would never work with both of us here. I wished for the power to refuse him from visiting at all, the pull and connection I felt between Everly and I balked at the thought of another person, especially Black being close to her.

"Fine. When are you're open periods?" I finally ask with frustration and resignation.

"Well, actually I'm free now from 9am-10am and again before dinner. You?"

I hesitate to tell my enemy my schedule, but as I look over at Everly I know I must take the risk for her. "I'm open from 8am-9am and after lunch."

He clasps his hands together, "perfect looks like we don't have to worry about…uh…getting in each other's way. Just out of curiosity what are you doing here now if this isn't your free time?" He asks with raised eyebrows.

"I already told you why I'm here, let me worry about where I'm supposed to be." I snap.

Black casually pulls up a chair before sitting down, "I guess what I should've said is… leave. It's my time, get lost Snape."

I scowl at him darkly and give one finally longing look over at Everly. I turn on my heel and walk out quickly my robes billowing behind me snapping against my legs as I walk briskly away.


	9. Prince Charming

**Half a Life Without You**

 **Chapter 9: Prince Charming**

 **Severus's POV:**

 _Leave…_ Black's last word still grates infuriatingly as I stomp into Potions class. I sweep past rows of seats ignoring everyone as I stride past, finally taking up my usual spot in the front. I sigh loudly and roughly push aside the cauldron which had been positioned neatly in front of me. Frustration claws at my insides demanding to be set free – I try to take a deep calming breath, but it only comes out as a menacing growl. This only gains me several startled stares from other students seated nearby, I want to tell them all to fuck off.

Suddenly, Xeno Lovegood swivels round in his chair staring at me with a puzzled expression, "How very…strange. No longer a gloomy gray, but rather a light green. Yes, it's very curious indeed."

"what are you going on about?" I ask with instant regret.

"Why your aura of course." He replies looking back at me with a dreamy expression.

 _What the actual fuck_. I glare back at him threateningly, he simply shrugs, gives me one last mystified glance before swiveling back around to face front just as Slughorn begins class.

Tapping my wand impatiently against the table I try and focus on what Slughorn is saying. "Can anyone tell me what potion calls for fermented spider eye?" He looks around until his eyes land on me. "Severus?"

I scowl in annoyance and reluctantly answer, "it can be used in several potions, the most common is called "Sanitatem" the potion for regeneration and healing."

Slughorn's face lights up with an eager expression, "yes, that's right! Now what do I get if I combine the fermented spider eye with Night-blooming jasmine?" All eyes turn to stare at me awaiting the answer including Slughorn. I resist the urge to roll my eyes before answering.

"Those two alone will yield no true results, but if you add crimson nirnroot and vampire dust you will create a potion known as "Sun's Death" it allows the drinker to become completely invisible and impenetrable to reveal spells, but only for one night, the rising sun will reveal the witch or wizard."

Slughorn claps me firmly on the shoulder, "excellent my boy, just excellent. 10 points to Slytherin for Severus's outstanding answer." Several cheers can be heard around the room.

"Are we making it? Sun's Death?" A Ravenclaw boy seated to my left excitedly asks cutting off the Slytherin celebration.

"What, oh no, no. we'll not be doing that today." Slughorn replies with a slight chuckle as if the answer was completely obvious.

The boy's face fell in disappointment. "Why not?"

Slughorn appears shocked at the follow-up question and proceeds to answer him as if he were speaking to a five-year-old child. "It's extremely dangerous, if the potion is not prepared.. _ **exactly**_..it can cause a permanent allergic reaction to sunlight and in some rare cases death when exposed to direct sunlight. No, no, it's best not to try. Vampire dust is hardly something one would just have on hand. Mind you it's also not easily obtained; you know because of the vampires." He tittered softly causing his belly to shake as he walks back to the front of the class.

I smirk when I hear the boy mutter to his neighbor," what was the bloody point in telling us all about it then."

The rest of the class passes achingly slow as I shift between making the Sanitatem potion and glaring at Xeno Lovegood each time I catch him sneaking peeks over his shoulder at me. Finally, I bottle my finished potion and head to up to the front of the class to hand it over to Slughorn. "Very good my boy, very good." He smiles with appreciation at the contents swirling in the small glass vials. "You may start on your research project in the library or perhaps assist students still working on their potions?" His voice hopeful I'll choose to stay and help. "The library, sir." I say without missing a beat _._ His face falls in disappointment, "very well, you are excused Mr. Snape."

The smell is the first thing I notice, I take a quick moment to breath in the familiar scents of parchment, dust, leather and perhaps a small hint of vanilla. I'm well acquainted with this place as I walk between the rows of neatly lined bookcases creaking softly as they sway and bend under the weight of large ancient volumes. Hundreds possibly thousands of books are stacked precisely upon the lovingly carved shelves, their spines cracked and dry with age. I head directly to the muggle literature section and begin my search for the perfect book I can read to Everly during my visits. I begin to imagine what seeing her again would be like, the only image I can conjure is one of me staring down at her awkwardly for an hour like a dark shadow watching her sleep… _no, I definitely need something to occupy the time I'm with her._

A copy of the Brothers Grimm fairytales catches my eye and I pull it from the shelf, flipping through I catch the story title Sleeping Beauty, _this is the one_. I continue to flip through the yellowed pages, my eyes widen a little as I recognize nearly all the stories my mother would tell me as a child.

I didn't pay much attention to it then but looking through them now, I can see how each story contains its own unique magical theme. I suppose these stories were her only way to provide me an early introduction into the wizarding world, filling my young mind with thoughts of fantastical beasts, the struggles between good vs. evil, heroes, villains, and the value of selfless love. I smile a little as I continue to read title after title (Hansel and Gretal, Snow White, Rapunzel, Beauty and the Beast, Cinderella. On and on, story after story all containing witches, wizards, elves, fairies, etc.) I'm impressed she was able to get away with discussing magic so openly in a home where my father literally beat the topic away. All disguised within a book of muggle fairy tales. Well… at least for a short time anyway. Before I can stop it, a memory of the last time my mother read to me flashes through my mind.

 **Flashback**

He was drunk, again. I watch him rip the children's book from my mother's hands, and glare down at the torn pages, "you notice… how the witches… are all… evil in these fairytales?" his harsh words are slurred and slow by alcohol.

I cry out in anger, "that's not true!" He waste no time smacking me hard to the ground, swaying dangerously he glares down at me, "don't talk back to me boy!" He moves to strike me again, but my mother positions herself in front of me to block him, "Tiberius, no!" He grabs her face and flings her to the ground beside me.

His eyes move back to the pages of the book, "Look here… Snow White's **evil** stepmother… WITCH! Rapunzel trapped in a tower, by you guessed it…an **evil** witch, Sleeping Beauty, put to sleep for a fucking hundred years by some **evil** slut using dark magic!" He turned suddenly and threw the book and torn pages into the fire. He glowers back at us and sneers with disgust at our weeping, "I'm going to get another drink, I'm too sober for this."

We stay huddled on the floor long after Tiberius slammed the front door behind him. My mother cradles me in her arms while gently smoothing back my hair." I pull away and stare into her black eyes, which were so like my own, only hers were like bottomless pools of darkness swimming in sorrow.

My chin quivers, but I had to know, "Mama, is magic bad? Am I evil? Like the witches in the fairy tales?"

"No, my love. Remember Cinderella and her fairy godmother, the good fairies in sleeping beauty. How about Merlin in the Sororcess Stone? Not all the fairytales are about evil witches or fairies. Severus, you must understand magic is not evil or bad, it's the person that welds the magic that decides. You can find dark in everything, but you can also find light. Most people are shades of gray." She said kissing my forehead.

"I love you mummy!" My little arms holding onto her tightly. "I love you too, Severus, always remember that."

 **End Flashback**

Wiping away a stray tear, I slowly begin to close the book but not before I notice a single line heavily penned on the inside cover. " **I know you, I walked with you once upon a dream."** I trace my hand over the untidy scrawl and whisper "once upon a dream" thoughts of Everly pour through me. Time to go, I quickly head up to check out and notice how Miss Pince raises her eyebrows as she sees my choice in literature, I stare back almost daring her to say something. But the corners of her mouth turn up ever so slightly, hardly a smile on anyone else, but the grim librarian seemed oddly pleased by my choice. Her normal uninviting expression returns swiftly, however, as she reads the title of the other books in my hand, "Vampires: A Wizards Handbook" and "Discovering Your Aura". I feel her disapproving gaze continue to bore into my back as I walk briskly out the door.

 _ **3 days later…**_

I notice a small note lying next to a game of chess as I approach Everly's sleeping form, **"Game in progress, do not touch! Sincerely, Sirus Black".** _God, what a prat, noticing his side of the board is winning_! visions of simply swiping the board clean brings a wicked grin to my face. Instead I call out a move "Rook to E4" I watch with pleasure as Everly's Rook crushes one of Sirus's knights.

I turn my sole attention to Everly, not knowing exactly how to begin, I clear my throat self-consciously, "uh, Everly it's me Severus" I sound like a moron. "I'm just going to read to you now." I fumble slightly as I open the book and skipping ahead to Sleeping Beauty.

 _Once upon a time there lived a king and queen who were very unhappy because they had no children. But at last a little daughter was born, and their sorrow was turned to joy. All the bells in the land were rung to tell the glad tidings…_

" _When the princess is seventeen years old, she shall prick her finger with a spindle, and-she-shall-die!" …._

 _At last the prince came to a chamber of gold, where he saw upon a bed the fairest sight one ever beheld—a princess of about seventeen years who looked as if she had just fallen asleep. Trembling, the prince knelt beside her, and awakened her with a kiss…_

 _The princess looked at him with wondering eyes and said: "Is it you, my prince? I have waited for you so long."_ _…_

As I finish reading the final lines of the story a crazy unforeseen thought crosses my mind. I hesitantly reach over with a trembling hand and tracing her lips with the tip of my finger. I wonder what would happen if I were to try and kiss her awake like Prince Charming in the fairy tales. I pull my hand back scoffing at such ridiculous wayward thinking, but I find myself leaning closer and closer.

I can't help but brush her lips with mine in a soft kiss. A tiny shock wave ripples between us sending a pleasant tremor coursing through my body. I pull back to take in her beautiful face. Only to see her eyes begin to flutter open swirling with surprise, "hi" she whispers. I smile in relief and whisper back, "hi".

Before I can say anything else, small stone butterflies suddenly spring to life separating themselves from the wall, they begin flying excitedly around Everly before swarming swiftly out of the infirmary door. Words escape me, I turn and stare into her bright blue eyes widened with shock.

Suddenly, the stone butterflies burst back through the infirmary doors, a fast-moving Madam Pomfrey not far behind, "move over Prince Charming." I could feel the heat rush into my cheeks at her comment as I she pushes past me. I look up to catch Everly watching me, I can tell she's attempting to suppress a smile and I can't help but smile back. _I'm such a simpering lovesick fool._

I move to try and stand on the other side of the bed when one of the damn stone butterflies flaps its hard wings right into my still bruised nose, "FUCK!" I yell out instinctively slapping away the damned stoned creature. I watch in horror as It careens out of control towards the window, "PULVINUS!" Madam Pomfrey quickly cast a pillowing spell, the butterfly bounces harmlessly away from the window before reattaching itself to the wall.

"Mr. Snape! I will not tolerate that type of language here young man! Not to mention nearly destroying part of my wall and window!" She yells angrily at me before taking in a deep calming breath, "now, I think it best if you return to visit this evening after I've had time to check over young Miss Quinn."

 _Not this again, every damn time something pushes me away, well not this….!_ Her voice breaks me free from my silent ranting, "Severus?"

"Yes?"

"Will you come back later? I'd like very much to talk with you." She asks so sweetly; my anger dissipates completely _._ I nod my head in acknowledgment, "I'll return to see you this evening…Everly."


	10. Author Note

2/19/20 – Author Note

This story has been calling to me to come back and finish it, so here I am. I've made several edits to my existing chapters trying to setup the story better for what's to come. I'm excited to take this journey and see where it goes. I have a lot drafted, but sometimes I surprise myself with what happens next. I hope you are enjoying! Stay tuned, I hope to have Chapter 10 "Golden Feathers" up soon.


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